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Baby weight gain, everyone needs to back off!

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Most people know who this lady is right? If you don’t you have have been living under a rock, as she is Jessica Simpson. Singer, actress,reality star, wearer of daisy dukes, all round hottie and American Sweetheart. Did I mentoin? she’s got her own line of hair extensions too? Moving on, so why am I writing about Jessica tonight? Well, with all Jessica’s success she’s made a big mistake of late,she’s got fat. Not just fat for the sake of it,as far as I am aware she is not in a serious relationship with the couch and cookie dough, but fat because she recently gave birth to her daughter Maxwell. Really, its not a mistake its just a natural thing, you get pregant you swell, slow like a steadily inflated ballon..thats what happened to Ms. Simpson. Now, she’s had her little girl and signed a whopper of a rumored 4million dollar deal with Weight Watchers to shed down pound and pull on the skinny jeans, everyone should be happy right?Wrong. I’m not happy. This whole pop out a baby business and be back in skinny jeans by the weekend has started to really bother me. Particularly, now many of my friend are having babies and grappling with the pressure of losing the baby weight.

First up, everyone is individual and some people can be pregnant and have a child with little change to there physical appearance. They are the lucky ones,in most cases there is a 2 to 3 stone weight gain and a missile of destruction to the mothers confidence along with it.The result..its such a funny one.. you’re so in love with your new child and so shocked at your body its an emotional minefield, “I love my baby, but am so fat can only wear clothes previously owned by Pavarotti”. 8 weeks after I gave birth to my own daughter, I remember going to buy some new clothes as the tents I was designated too in my last  trimester weren’t doing anything to lift my spirits (actually yeah I think even my soul gained a few pounds while I was expecting whoops!) I wanted my sexy back FAST! like all the celebs!! I remember Kate Hudson had lost most of baby weight in 2 months, I was determined to do the same. I was DETERMINED but it hadn’t worked, the size 16 jeans wouldn’t close and the top looked like it had be spray painted on. I sat in the fitting room and sobbed,what had happened to my body? was it my fault I had gotten fat did I eat too much? Did I exercise too little? Was I just not as focused as Kate Hudson?(wagon). While, I sobbed my little heart out that day on that cold fitting room floor,I needed to hear  3 little words (no,not get up fatty, but I’m sure some of the staff felt like saying it) but “please be patient”. They would have made all the difference. You see, the culture of be skinny fast after bearing a child had got in on me, and felt like a failure for not bouncing back into shape immediately.It was one of my lowest moments.

So, I gave up trying on the skinny jeans for a bit, stopped tortured myself with my pre pregnancy clothes and just concentrated on being a mother. I looked after my baby, fed her and myself healthily and found a little routine. I went to the gym twice a week. It didn’t always happen but I made it a priority. Slowly, and surely my body deflated, healed and started to hone itself a little too.I honestly thought I would never make it back to this place. I think of the girl crying in the fitting room day and I want to put my arm around her and tell her everything will be ok just “be patient” and enjoy this time with your new baby don’t let it be ruined by ridiculous unattainable goals. One midwife gave me some good advice,”it takes nine months to have a baby and nine months for the body to fully heal and return to shape etc” she had lost of other good pieces of advice too, but I was too busy reading about stretch mark creams to take it all in (typical). My final point, I have no doubt, she’ll be back rocking the daisy dukes in the near future, but  I hope Jessica Simpson takes her time losing her weight and shrugs off the pressure, in favor of enjoying her new months of motherhood and giving herself some time to settle into her role as mom.Anyone who has been a new mom, knows what a shock it is, and its a pretty full on gig, no much time for treadmills when a baby is teething, but yet with a plan,and generous sprinkle of patience you’ll arrive to where you need to be, happy, and healthy with your kids and its soo worth the weight ;)

Brian and Kerry, a sorry tale

In the last few weeks Brian McFadden has wed the beautiful Vogue Williams in what looks to me like a no expense spared spectacular ceremony in Italy. The bride was radiant, the groom was dapper and everyone was happy until…Brian makes a cutting comment to a magazine journalist that he “knew what he was doing” this time. Implying he did not know what he was doing when he tied the knot for the first time with Kerry Katona back in 2002.

No matter what has happened between two people, to make little of a union particularly when there is children involved is always a huge NO! We have all seen their lives played out in public, before, during and after the marriage. Everyone one will agree it has not been pretty. Kerry and Brian are both controversial figures, and living in the land of magazines and reality shows can be a tricky path to navigate, but no one put a gun to Mr. McFadden’s head when he decided to wed Kerry.He decided to do it of his own free will. In hindsight, he may have decided it was a bad decision, but to make little of the mother of your two children and what you once shared is a something that should simply not happen.

Its’ a wrong in the world. Marriage’s break up, relationships flounder. It happens. It HURTS. When all the craziness dies away, when it stops stinging. A little respect, and tack for your ex partner goes a long way. Kerry has hit back at Brian’s comments on Twitter saying never in a million years would she dismiss her first marriage,especially after bringing two beautiful children into the world. Kerry may have lost alot of battles with Brian, but this new, fair and admirable attitude …she may yet win the war.

 

 

Old or young, moms are getting hotter!

Getting older. Like most twenty somethings I was pretty sure it would never going to happen to me. I was confident that my domain of clear taunt skin, bright eyes and lack of wrinkles was my permanent physical address. Dressing to suit my “age” was never something that would ever apply to me as well, as far as I’m concerned I’m going to be 27 mentally and physically forever.Also being a mom to my wonderful eight year old daughter Ava, the way I see it, I have help in looking and feeling younger.In the future if things get rough, and I’m feeling a bit 1996 I can just rob her high tops and a biker jacket and ..boom! back to being bang on trend. I realize that the One Direction fan look may not suit me when I hit 50, but until then I’m pretty happy to hipster it up while I can.

The fact is whatever their age, moms are getting hotter. Not only in celeb world but everywhere. I for one, think this is a great development. This morning 56 year old Kris Jenner (below)

who is a mom of 6 kids,appeared looking happy,fit and fabulous on the US magazine New Idea. Ok, so I hear you all saying but “she is loaded!and has had some work done!!no mere mortal can keep up with that!!” This to an extend is true. Having endless bags of cash at your disposable can help hugely in maintaining your looks,but their is another aspect to Kris too. Watching her on “Keeping up with The Kardasians” you notice Kris values herself, and makes  her image a priority. She has the 3 S’s, sexy, attractive and super confident and proud of who she is.

In the not so distant past here in Ireland, there was a culture of martyrdom among-est many mothers. It was seen as good parenting to let your family know that you went without a new outfit, hair cut etc so the children could have something new instead etc. Saying how little you spent on yourself  and little you valued and maintained yourself seemed to me as a child, to be nearly applauded.Even as a child this never sat well with me. Of course, as a mother myself now, my child is my priority, but I know I’m a better mother to her when I’m feeling good about myself. I also know she sees me as not as just a care taker, but an individual who values herself  separately  from being a mother. Being a mother should never be a death sentence to your style, or to feeling good about yourself..whether your thing, is your hair, nails,clothes gym sessions, facials etc. Keep it up! In my experience happy confident moms, have happy confident children. So whether you’re at the nappy stage or the narky teenage stage with your brood, make sure keeping yourself happy is a priority, cliche as it sounds L’oreal do say it best ..”you are so very worth it”!

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